"I looked back down the crooked path and saw the
FAITHFULNESS of God!"
How did I get here? Have you ever thought like that in your life? I wouldn't be
surprised because I think we all have.
A little over a year ago I felt like God was calling me to take six months out of my life to join YWAM and then go back to working in the lab in Portland. (It's funny how He only shares what we can handle at the time without overwhelming us.) During the first four weeks of YWAM I knew I would be coming back on staff. At this point I called my folks and told them I wouldn't be coming back to work and that I really felt like I would stay in YWAM. Seven weeks into YWAM I had the opportunity to go on staff with two different DTS' (Discipleship Training School), "Awaken" and "Fire and Fragrance." This turned out to be one of the hardest decisions of my life and at the time I didn't know why... but I ended up choosing Awaken, even though I still felt Fire and Fragrance too, not knowing God's full plan for my time in YWAM.
January of this last year I came back to Kona on staff with Awaken. Being one of the few staff here I had the opportunity to work with the school leader of Fire and Fragrance while I waited for things to get going. It's funny how His plan looks crooked to us, yet it is straight according to heaven's perspective. While helping with ministry in Fire and Fragrance I began to see things in my own life that were holding me back, places that the enemy had hold of. I had some leaders pray with me about this and went through a time of strong deliverance in which I was more free to hear from the Lord. The night this happened I had a dream from the Lord in which He instructed me that I was to be a part of this new school called "Circuit Riders." Reluctantly I took this to Andrew the school leader for Awaken and had him pray and see if he felt it was from God. Andrew confirmed this and more by telling me that he felt the Lord was saying for him to release me completely from Awaken. At the time I didn't want to hear this because I "knew" I was supposed to staff Awaken.
Two months ago I went home to Portland for a month or so to gain perspective and I was really loving it hoping and praying that the Lord would bring me back there soon. I truly thought that he was going to bring me back for good in December. Well it turns out that He saw things differently than I.
Upon my return to Kona a month ago I still believed I would do the 5 week "Circuit Rider" school and then jump into my staffing roll with Awaken and lead a team to Ireland (the Lord spoke to me about going to Ireland in February but I figured it was for outreach with Awaken) for three months then return to Portland in December for good. I had it all planned out but was missing what the Lord was saying. I had heard the Lord yes, but not fully... I was still getting in the way of what He was telling me.
Three weeks ago in the midst of unrest and turmoil in my heart, I laid it all down before the Lord and told Him I would do whatever He wanted me to do as long as there was peace and rest in my heart. This is when He laid it all out for me.
He told me I was to go to Ireland... that I was a part of Awaken... that I was to do Circuit Rider... that I would go back to Portland... BUT NOT HOW I PLANNED IT, RATHER HOW HE PLANNED IT!
As you might notice this is the massively condensed version of the story... but all of this to say the following:
I will be going to Ireland after the five weeks of
Circuit Riders for two months and then I will return to Portland.
I will only be in Portland though for a couple months,
at the end of which I will be moving to Ireland for at least 2 years!
I will carry the heart of Awaken to the community that we are planting
out there and I will always be a part of the Awaken family because
it is with them I did my DTS and with their blessing I go out to
pioneer this community centered around the presence of God!
With all of this said, I know that many of you might still have questions and I don't blame you because I shortened this story like you wouldn't believe. So please feel free to email me or call me with any questions you might have about my decision. In light of this decision I really need long-term support both prayerfully and financially so if you are interested please contact me so I can share more of my heart in all of this. I love you all and life is crazy... but living life for God is so very worth it.
Who would have thought that I would be where I am?
Only God can see the beginning, middle, and end... isn't it time
we trust His voice?!?!